Real Life Rules
Rule 1: Life is not
fair; get used to it.
Rule 2: The world does not care about your
self-esteem. The world expects you to
accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3: You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year
right out of high school. You will not be a vice president with a car phone until
you earn both.
Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till
you get a boss. She does not have tenure.
Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your
dignity. Your grandparents had a
different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunity.
Rule 6: If you mess up, it is not your parents' fault,
so do not whine about your mistakes. Learn from them.
Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents were not as
boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your
clothes, and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save
the rainforest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing
the closet in your own room.
Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and
losers but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades;
they give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This, of
course, does not bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You do not
get summers off, and very few employers are interested in helping you find
yourself. Do that on your own time.
Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real
life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Rule 11: Be
nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
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